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Sunday, September 29

So far, So Bad

Been trying to suppress the urge to give you a text, wanting to know so much of what you're doing right now.
Have you eaten? Are you tired? Did you have fun at your bball game? Are you missing me? How much did you miss me?

It's quite a hard time for me to deal with all these emotions rn, not to mention my parents aren't in good health recently. We are busy growing up and didn't realize how much they've grown.

Mum's been checking on me (regards to the breaking up symptom) Guess she might have noticed the tears I secretly shed in my room. Sigh..

Sometimes I just find myself literally stoning, not doing anything or thinking anything.

Why did you leave me when you're my world?
I still miss you x


Monday, September 16

Shattered





Today was the first time in our 6 years relationship that I asked for a break up.

Maybe it was me and my feelings got unconcerned.
Maybe it was me sick and tired of a quarreling relationship. 
Maybe it was me and my emotions ride.
Maybe it was me that wasn't understanding enough. 

After so long, I didn't thought that I would mention the word break because I told myself we came so far and I need to be tolerable and accountable for my feelings and action. Whatever I say, whatever I do it would affect the both of us.

Maybe what I just wanted after I pushed you away was another tight hug given back to me.
You said you think it through, you said the same thing will happen again, you said I was never the same old me again.

My heart's shattered, my souls broken.
It's time for you to go.
No matter how much I want you back, you're never returning. 
Never giving me back the same love you did.

Everything has changed. 

"Change is the only constant"

You don't even tell me where you go,
probably you think it's because the phone has no battery, you will be fine. 
To me, telling me where you are can make me at ease. At least I know where you are.
Now, I don't even get the chance to ask.

I just need more love and concern.